At the beginning of each Mastermind meeting, the facilitator shares a tip of the week with the group. Last week, in her infinite wisdom, our facilitator, Erica, posed a question to the group: what is one thing you want to focus on or remember this school year. While it was valuable for everyone, it was also a gesture of kindness as I enter my first year as principal, and can use all the tips I can get.

Out of this activity came a list of guiding principles any leader might use this year, whether it is in a school or somewhere else. To be honest, many apply to being a good teacher, a good parent, or just a good human. It’s only right that I pass these along and share the wisdom of the Guiding Principals’ Mastermind.

Clear is Kind

The Brené Brown mantra, shared by our resident Brené Brown lookalike, Erica, is one we often repeat in the group and has helped me focus on what is really needed. It is a reminder to stop ‘trying’ to be kind and realize that if you are clear with people, you are being kind. Let the know what you mean, what you need, and try not to tiptoe around in an effort to be polite.

Slow Your Roll

Lizzy’s tip reminds us that the start of a year can be hectic, with many things to accomplish. In trying to do it all, we may actually accomplish less, or make enough mistakes that we waste time having to correct those errors. Slow down and a few things well rather than many things poorly.

Breathe and water

One way to slow down is to remind yourself to breathe. Christine’s tip is the first and often our most important step in staying healthy. When things get tough, don’t forget to breathe, and as Paige says, “Drink the damn water!” Also, eat lunch.

Remember the Titans

Ben’s tip helps us remember that, while we should definitely take the time to meet our new colleagues and welcome them to their new environment, we also have a lot of veterans around us who need connection as well. Everyone wants to feel supported, and some of our experienced teachers really need it. I was fortunate to have a teacher visit my office today and share a personal challenge she is going through lately. Despite being a veteran teacher, this year may feel more difficult because of this change, and she will need my support as well as her colleagues. I am lucky that she shared, but I also need to reach out to make sure others know they can share about their lives as well.

I am here to learn –

The expectation, often internal, for leaders to know all the answers can be fear-inducing. Fred not only shared this tip as a way to remind us that we always have something to learn, but also to share that with your teams. You can’t know it all and pretending to is obviously inauthentic. Don’t be afraid to share that you are learning with those around you.

Live in your honesty

On a similar note, Paige reminds us to be authentic in each situation, not just when we need to learn. Stop worrying about smoke in mirrors, and be honest about where we are and what we need. That doesn’t mean we should say whatever is on our mind, but we need to realize when we aren’t being ourselves, when we’re trying to please someone rather than move forward. Be yourself, as often as you can. (I wrote all the time first, but I know we all slip out of authenticity, which is why we need the reminder to bring ourselves back.)

If you want to make everybody happy, sell ice cream

I saved the funniest for last. There are going to be tough moments, difficult conversations, hard decisions. We didn’t choose to be leaders because we wanted everyone to be happy, which is impossible anyway. Whatever reason you chose to be a leader, keep that purpose in mind. You’ve been given the responsibility to make the hard decisions, so be confident in your choices.

One more shout out to Erica for asking the group to share their tips for the school year. I hope they can help you as much as I expect them to help me.